helloooooo out there!

It's been TOOOOOOO long since I've blogged.  I sit down several times a week to blog and then....i just really waste my time doing other things..mostly crafting on my new Cameo machine. That thing is so fun and I am hoping to open a little shop soon making shirts, vinyl decals, and other unique gifts :)

So, for all the friends and family who would like an update on our little life in the Sunshine State...i'll do my best!

1.  Seth and I are on day 8 of Whole30.  We did a ton of research and reading about this program and loves what it teaches and stands for.  NO refined/processed sugar, no dairy, grains, legumes, or any desserts.  It's been amazing really.  We previously had a pretty terrible diet of eating whatever we wanted all the time and needed to reign in our bad habits.  Why not go all in and do something like this, right?  It's been hard sometimes, but we both haven't cheated one time and feel amazing.  21 more days! And then yes, I will have a chick fil a sandwhich and a milkshake, but I am learning SO much about healthy food prep, healthy snacks, and have surprised myself with my willpower!  We are taking a LOT from this program and plan to basically eat Paleo from here on out, after our Whole30 ends. 

2. The little munchkins are growing and such a handful!  Hogan is now crawling! CRAWLING, people! He pulls himself up to standing and hates being contained now.  He is all over the place.  His favorite thing to do is sit in the hallway and watch Winslow run up and down over and over.  Winslow is now 3 years and 2 months and such a smart little guy.  He is in preschool twice and week and absolutely LOVES it. 

3. This year is ALMOST over and I CANNOT BELIEVE IT.  It's flown by.  Seriously.  Flown.  Soon, it's Halloween, then Thanksgiving and Christmas! My mom and stepdad, my stepbrother and 2 brothers are coming in for Christmas and I'm so excited to have them all here.  We are also making a trip to Texas the beginning of November! So busy!

4. My newest obession:  The Happy Hour with Jamie Ivey podcast.  Seriously, if you are a woman, you need to listen to this.  I mean, if you're not, you still can but it's just a bunch of women talking.  But Jamie has a different woman on her show every week and they just chat about their lives, what the Lord is doing and how he is writing their story..it's SO good and encouraging..Some familiar women who've been on there are Jen Hatmaker, Shaun Neiquiest, Beth Moore, Lauren Chandler, Shelly Giglio..etc.  Go get it!

5.  I have Hogan's 7 month and 8 month post written and the photos taken, but just haven't gotten it all together! Ahh i am so behind...second child problems, i reckon. 

Enjoy a few photos and hopefully I'll be back soon with more updates. :) 

The angels are dancing with you, sweet one.

Today.

September 30, 2016.

My baby's 1st birthday.  in heaven.  

If you didn't know this about me, I had a miscarriage between my two boys.  Read about it here.

And today, today...my little angel would have been one year old.  

I would have rocked him to sleep tonight, sang him "You are my sunshine", and given him the biggest kiss.  I would have woken up at midnight to nurse him just so I could whisper "Happy Birthday, my sweet miracle" in his ear like I did with Winslow.   We would have celebrated with balloons and birthday cake and donuts. 

Instead, my little angel is celebrating in heaven with the almighty creator.  How awesome is that.   

Grief is such a confusing thing.  Sometimes I go weeks without thinking of my loss.  But then other days, I think about my baby all day long. Who would he/she look like? Would he/she be walking?  Would Winslow have a built in best friend?  This week leading up to the big first birthday has been strange.   Strange in that I feel like I should celebrate where I am now.  I have Winslow, my rambunctious 3 year old, and Hogan, my cuddly 7 month old.  But it still doesn't make it easier.   I absolutely cannot imagine my life without Hogan, but I still wonder if this little angel was a girl or a boy.  Would I have a curly headed girl running around?  Would I have a brown headed boy? 

Regardless, I am celebrating the little life that lived inside me for almost 9 weeks.  I am celebrating the miracle and celebrating the hard but good year we've had.  A friend, Casey, explained how I feel so wonderfully:


"When you lose something that you love so fiercely and so dearly, it shatters all of you. And when you slowly glue the pieces back together one by one, piece by piece.... then, when you are finally put back together... you're different. 


You can love differently. Better. Because you know it's fragile. 
Life. It's a gift.  A gift to be cherished, celebrated, adored."

 Because of this, I love my boys so different than before.  So although I long to be with my baby in heaven, I am thankful for constant reminder that life is so precious.  Today will always be your heavenly birthday and we will celebrate your life, even if it was short. I will always cherish the only sonogram photo I have of you and I promise to hold your brothers extra close.

Happy Birthday, my love.  Heaven is holding you tight until I get there. <3 br="">

Winslow's First Day of Preschool!

So last week was a big week for us:  Winslow had his first day of preschool!  I was so nervous and anxious the entire week.  He was just plain excited.


I dropped him off, he hid behind my legs for a couple minutes ( which I secretly loved) and then off he went.  He didn't look back and when I went to pick him up, he cried because he didn't want to go!  Such a relief.  I am so happy he loves it, and it gives me some 1 on 1 time with baby brother.

Enjoy these 1st day of school photos!  Oh man, life is going so quickly. I am doing my absolute best to soak up every single day I have with my precious boys.

Winslow's Third Birthday Photos

When we were in Texas, we decided to take some photos of W with the big trucks and dump trucks, diggers, and steam rollers that were parked beside our house on the road. Since we were having him a Construction themed birthday party, I knew this was perfect to display around the house that day.  More on the party later this week! 

Look how cute (and big!) my boy is.  I'm so lucky to be his momma.

Our trip to Texas

So earlier this month, the boys and I flew to Texas to visit family.  Seth did not get to go due to work, so I loaded up my crew and we flew to Dallas.  It was HARD traveling with two kids by myself, and I came back saying I'd not do it again, but I probably will.  ;)  The flight there was no fun, Hogan was upset (and by upset, I mean SCREAMING) 3/4 of the flight but he redeemed himself when he was awake and HAPPY the entire way back.

We had such a great time visiting my dad and stepmom, my grandmother, and other family and friends.  We went to the lake for a couple days, got to see my BFF since 4th grade and enjoyed life on the farm.

  Winslow loved getting up at 6am and feeding the chickens (thank the Lord, I got to sleep in with Hogan every morning), he enjoyed swimming in the pool, and chasing the goats.  He really did have the time of his life.

We went to the lake for a couple days and it was his first time water tubing.  He loved it and even wanted to go faster!

He also caught his very first fish, all by himself!

What a wonderful time. We enjoyed every minute of it.