7 things.

1.  It's past my bedtime.  and it's only 9:19pm.  I've been in bed since 8:45 and of course this freakin' computer made me stay up.  (Thanks Pinterest, Instagram and Lightroom)  I've been getting in bed no earlier than 11 every single night lately, and it SUCKS when W wakes up at 3-4 to eat...little does he know that night time feeding is about to go bye bye.  #wishmeluckplease

2.  We are going to a wedding this weekend.  Hubby is off Saturday (PRAISE THE LORD) and I bought Winslow the cutest outfit ever. Think:  Janie and Jack chambray beret, green chinos, white oxford, navy striped bow-tie... hello cutie.  Also,  I have a hot date Saturday morning.  With Starbucks and TARGET.  by MYSELF.  I shall walk every single aisle.  Multiple times. 

3.  I am going to be rocking' a once piece this summer.  and I'm a-ok with it.  and it has polka dots and ruching.  What more could you want? It's from Polo Ralph Lauren.





4.  I need to branch out in how I style my hair...here is how I currently do it:  Straight  or in a boring pony tail...I will curl it once every blue moon, but I need some easy tutorials for THICK long hair.  Anyone got any?

5.  Winslow is at such a FUN age right now.  He's almost 8 months (GASP) and he is into everything already.  He can crawl/scoot backwards, pull up on things, scream with excitement all day long, and he just smiles at us nonstop.  When I walk in the door after I get off work, the second he sees me, he squeals.  It melts my heart into a gigantic puddle.  This boy is going to be crawling soon.  SOON.  Oh boy, am I in for it.

6.   I am already planning his first birthday.  WHAT.  Yeah, I'm crazy.  and you better believe it'll have a fox or two in it...I've made my pinterest boards private so no one can see them except me.  HA!  I know, I'm ridiculous.  I also want to order a custom cloth diaper for him to wear.  Does that make me extra crunchy?

7.  I sometimes wonder if I'll ever be able to sleep in without waking up ever again.  Is that bad of me to think that?  I mean, this morning after W woke up around 6:45, I nursed him (praying he would go back to sleep in our bed for at least 30 minutes..yeah, didn't happen) so Seth took him and let me sleep for another hour.  it was glorious.  But since we want more kiddos sooner rather than later, I'll pretty much always have babies in my life for the next several years...which I am so excited for and love the thought of it, but I really did take for granted those days I slept in until NOON when I was pregnant. ha!  I can bet $100 that won't happen when I get pregnant next time.  I'll have a toddler running into my bedroom when the sun comes up.  But I can't wait for those days either.  You can sleep when you're old, right? (Well, then you'll probably not be able to due to overactive bladder or something like that)

Goodnight!  Must.go.to.bed.

yes, he's eating my toe.  no, that's not sanitary. 

Sometimes it's hard.

I feel like everyone has moments where things just plain suck. I mean, you can always look on the bright side or see the glass half full, but sometimes it's okay for life to just suck. Least I think so.  

This week has been that week for me. Nothing really happened that made my whole week suck, but just the combination of W not sleeping great, me going to bed way to late, drama at work, ( ughhh), and hubby working long long days/going to school twice a week until 10pm. It's easy to get down in the dumps but that's why I'm writing it all down... Once I hit 'publish', the pity party is over, okay?

I sometimes feel guilty for not being able to stay at home with Winslow. I know millions and millions of moms work, and full time at that, but I feel like my calling is to be a full time mom. I've never had that career mindset and I just want to be there and watch my children grow. I don't want to miss one single thing, and even though I work only part time, it gets to me sometimes. Especially when my hours are all wonky and always changing.  I feel like once we have good routine down, things change and we are back at square one. Sigh.

I have such a great respect for moms who work full time.  And you know what? Some moms are better moms because of that.  I know that everyone is different and just because you choose to work outside of the home does NOT mean you are less of a mom.  In fact, you are superwoman in my eyes because sometimes I can barely get my butt out the door at 10am. Oh yeah, and can't forget the breast pump, the toys or the baby.  

One day I know I'll be able to stay home, and I am so thankful for my husband who is working hard to make that happen.  I know this is just a season, but I still get all pouty faced when I think about it too much. Which is obviously me right now. Ha.

Also we are getting ready to put our house on the market.   Yep.  We may be moving to Timbuktu(well anywhere he gets offered a job) come August.  When hubby graduates with his masters in trust and wealth management, we will more than likely hit the road.  Wherever the Lord leads us. And of course, where he can make some money too.  I know I only have one kid, and he's semi- immobile right now, but decluttering and painting and repainting and getting junk together for a yard sale all while working and being a momma, and a good wife can be challenging.  Once W goes to bed, all I want to do is grand the Talenti Gelato and stuff my face while watching Parenthood. (That show is legit!) 

But I have to clean the house and get everything ready for the next day. If I'm lucky, I'll sit for a couple minutes and stalk peeps on Instagram.

I guess this whole post is a bunch of me worrying about uncertainty.  Where will we be in 5-6 months. Will I get to stay at home. Will our house sell. Will we find another one.  Will we know anyone wherever the heck we move. Yada yada yada. 

The good thing is, God is never uncertain. He knows our future and has a better plan than we do, for sure. 

Just gotta keep reminding myself that. 

Pity party over.

Now for some pretty funny going ons from the past week:

Yep, he's trying to nurse my knee.  Wasn't successful.

The husband is unaware of this photo...how did my nursing pad get lodged between his head and the pillow? Ha!

Mohawk man.

 

And this fella is chillin'.

Yes. I just went there.

My little boy.

He's growing up right under my nose.

I love him so.